Sunday, January 22, 2006

Rerun: Get the Hint

A reader recently asked me if I would outline some specific behaviors that are annoying to flight attendants.
I've combed through my archives, and have found a few earlier posts that answer this questions square on.  So, just like your favorite television series re-runs a popular episode, I'll be re-running some of my previous posts over the next couple weeks.
Here's the first one, originally posted August 18th, 2005.

Here’s a hint: If you put your bag in the overhead compartment, and it sticks over the lip of the compartment, it’s not going to close. If it doesn’t close, it’s not going to be able to stay that way. So do everyone a favor, and make sure your bag fits before you sit down. Everyone will appreciate it.

And while we're at it, here’s some other hints:

We really do need you to put your seatbelt on. We don’t say this to harass you, it’s our job. The FAA makes us. We don’t want to get a personal fine or get fired for not doing our job. So just buckle up. It will make life easier for both of us.

Turn the damn cell phone off. You’re not that important! It really can wait till you get to your destination. Besides that, we're not going anywhere until you do.

If you are a person of size, please ask us for a seatbelt extension. Don’t pretend like you’re buckled in. We have to make sure that you are, so when we look, it’s just as embarrassing for us to look at your fat body as it is for you. Help us out here and make everyone a little more comfortable: ask for an extension.

When we come through the cabin with the beverage cart, it might be a good time to start thinking about what you’d like to drink. The beverage cart is the big 300 pound thing that we are struggling to push down the aisle. It takes us a long time. When we get to your row you need to be ready to answer the question of the day: What would you like to drink? Please don’t ask us what we have, because we know that you don’t really care. Just tell us what you want. We’ll let you know if we don’t have it. And for goodness sake, if you’re wearing those sound elimination headsets, take the damn things off. You can’t hear us, and we just get annoyed that you don’t realize that there’s a 300 pound cart parked right by you, and that you don’t understand we are talking to you. We are. Yes, we are talking to YOU!

If the answer to the beverage question is coffee, we’ll give it to you. Gladly. And then we’ll move on. If you want cream, sugar, and/or sweetener, just tell us when you order your coffee. We’ll give it to you. Gladly. But it really pisses us off if you wait till we’re two rows away and you wait till then to let us know.

There are other things that really annoy us. But that’s another post on another day.



Flygirl said...

and the list goes on! hehehe!

JoeyC said...

Fly Girl (AKA: Yuhu):

That was a good list, but I'm surprised you need to say that!

It is VERY common sense to fasten your seatbelts; takeoff/landing/turbulence can be bad, and should an emergency occur, the last thing a rear-facing flight attendant wants is the passenger in row one to come crashing through the bulkhead, for those A/C with mirror bulks.

I am very suprised, once again, that you left out a few.

With respect to your post, I'd like to post a few things that my mom doesnt like... they are mixed from her days at DL, and her new days at JetBlue, so don't mind me!

Passengers choosing potty time accordingly.... my mom complains about her days at DL, with narrowbody aircraft... people in 4A would go to the bathroom RIGHT when service began. They saw the cart one row ahead, so they went all the way to the back. Come seven minutes, and they're done, coming out, they notice... Oh my goodness, that cart moved two rows! Only 23 more rows to go!

You guys.... wait until service is done, or wait until the cart passes you, so you can go to the front lavatory, and avoid disrupting or delaying snack service.

At jetblue, they use the basket, so my mom has her fair share of people trying to rub up behind her to get through... once again, NARROW-BODY aircraft, meaning NARROW aisles. Watch yourself.

And how about those passengers that try to talk to you over their headphones? I think all flight crew should be able to listen to MP3 Players while servicing the cabin. Passengers say something, the crew can't hear! Oh well!

Of course, the passengers that bolt out of their seats right when the gear touch down. Y'all will get off, don't worry. Even if it does mean waiting the whole 4 minutes to get to the gate.

Ever notice the passengers that fluff up their newspapers right during the safety demo? They make a huge distraction, and they neeeeed to extend the newspapers all the way out, blocking people behind from seeing the demo!

Heres a hint: When flying, use those little metal boxes in the checkin line... the ones that give you dimensions on how big a baggage must be to bring on board. You can't bring all of your twenty bags on board, hun.

When you're cruising at FL350, some people forget what they're doing. As stupid as it sounds... you cant ring a crewmember and tell them you want something thats not on board. When you're in-flight, and you ask for a double chocolate latte, not like Captain John is gonna land the plane on the nearest highway, and have the flight attendant do a Starbucks run for ya... not gonna happen.

Just a few, I'll let Fly Girl do the rest!


Flygirl said...

lol...great additions joey! :)

marco_099 said...

Hey Hi Lady, first of all i want to apologize if i were rude in the "Paying My Salary or Subsidizing Your Travel" post, but it touhght that anonymous 2 was over the edge, and very unpolite.
Anyway,i didn´t know there were seatbelt extensions, maybe some fat men dosen´t know either.
Saludos and wow, u have such a pretty and incredible smile there!

Yvonne said...

I think my biggest pet peeve is the coffee issue that you wrote about in your post. That one just seems to ruin my entire day. It's horrible that it most often happens in the

Noone has mentioned this one: People who toss their garbage in my ice bin on the beverage cart. I have even had people stick their hands in the ice bin to help themselves to more ice.